Stress is real.
You feel it. I feel it. Life applies pressure to us. Sometimes, the tension feels uncomfortable but manageable. Other times, the pressure is so great we feel like we’re going to crack.
What you feel, others feel too. One study revealed that more than three out of every four people regularly experience physical symptoms caused by stress. In the same study, half of the respondents reported lying awake at night because of stress. We’re a stressed-out society!
The Bible says, “We who are strong have an obligation to bear with the failings of the weak” (Romans 15:1). Strengthened by the Holy Spirit, how can we help others when they’re under the oppressive weight of stress? Here are some biblical insights.
1. Be Patient and Understanding.
Not everyone deals with stress the same way you do. A particular issue may not faze you, but it might frazzle someone else. We can be tempted to judge others for their struggles, thinking to ourselves, “He shouldn’t be bothered by that so much.” When that’s our mindset, we’re coming at the issue from a perspective of judgment, not compassion. Scripture instructs us in 1 Thessalonians 5:14:
Encourage the fainthearted, help the weak, be patient with them all.
Patience includes giving others permission to struggle in their own way. With that mindset, we’re much more prepared to minister to others in their stress.
2. Listen Well.
When comforting a person dealing with stress, some have suggested an 80-to-20 ratio—listening 80 percent of the time and speaking 20 percent. Often, people simply need a listening ear to validate their struggles and demonstrate concern. Our job isn’t to fix others. It’s to be there for them. When Job’s friends responded to his pain with unhelpful pontificating, he called them “miserable comforters” and asked, “Shall windy words have an end?” (Job 16:2–3). Rather than speaking windy words, we can offer a gentle spirit, a humble heart, and listening ears.
3. Speak Encouragement.
Proverbs 12:25 says:
Anxiety in man’s heart weighs him down, but a good word makes him glad.
In our 20 percent time of speaking, we can bless others with words of encouragement and strength. Those words might include, “You can do this,” “God will help you through this,” “Don’t give up,” and “I’m here for you.” In our words, we can be of the same spirit that Isaiah wrote about: “The Lord GOD has given Me the tongue of those who are taught, that I may know how to sustain with a word him who is weary” (Isaiah 50:4). Simple, kind words can help sustain the weary.
4. Help Carry Their Burden.
In Galatians 6:2, God’s Word tells us,
Bear one another’s burdens, and so fulfill the law of Christ.
The other day, I was feeling stressed and overwhelmed. My eleven-year-old son offered to make lunches for the next day and wash the current stack of dishes. Not having to do those routine tasks brought about feelings of relief and gratitude to my son for his thoughtfulness. In your ministry to the stressed-out, offer practical ways to assist—not just a general “Tell me if you need anything” but a specific “I can take care of this for you so you have one less thing to think about.”
5. Attend to Your Own Stress.
Jesus expertly modeled stress management and spiritual renewal. Think about it. He was in great demand—crowds “followed Him and thronged about Him” (Mark 5:24) and were “pressing in on Him” (Luke 5:1). Imagine the stress, the expectations, the pressure to perform! Jesus knew how to step away from the action and recharge. He regularly went away to a desolate place and connected with His Father. When we manage our own stress levels, we position ourselves to help others with their stress. Some call it being a “less anxious presence.” When you’re about to snap, you’re not much good to others, especially when others add their stress to yours. But when you nourish your own soul, you can approach others from a calmer state of being, ready to assist them in their needs.
Scripture: ESV®.
We could all use more Christlike grace. Rev. Kennedy’s book, Grace Under Pressure: Responding Faithfully to Stress, helps you model your response to stress after Jesus.
